Groucho Marx
“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.” (The essential Groucho)
Albert Einstein
“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
Pirates Party’s rapid rise upsets German landscape
(Reuters) – With some sporting pirate garb and black beards in light-hearted tribute to their name, Germany’s Pirates party gathered in a small city hall and in the vast open…
Details emerge of China activist’s escape
Dissident who met Chen Guangcheng after he arrived in Beijing says the blind activist climbed over a high wall at night. New testimony has emerged about how Chen Guangcheng, a…
Streetviewed: Google cars snooping on WiFi users not an accident
Google bosses knew their Street View cars would collect e-mails, names, addresses and other personal data from Wi-Fi users around the world, a government report shows. The search giant had…
Cameron denies “grand deal” to help Murdoch
(Reuters) – Prime Minister David Cameron has denied favouring Rupert Murdoch’s business interests in exchange for political support from his newspaper empire, and defended a minister’s handling of an ill-fated…
Obama turns entertainer – but not everyone approves
The President displayed his talent for stand-up at the annual White House correspondents’ dinner. It was the annual White House correspondents’ dinner on Saturday, hosted by the late-night talk…
Bin Laden files show al-Qaida and Taliban leaders in close contact
Blow to Afghan peace hopes as documents reveal Bin Laden, Zawahiri and Omar discussed joint operations against Nato. Documents found in the house where Osama bin Laden was killed a…
Dwain Chambers lifetime ban lifted after British Olympic Association bylaw is overturned
Telegraph Sport can reveal that the Court for Arbitration in Sport has ruled that the BOA’s life ban does not comply with the World Anti-Doping Association code and is therefore…
Explosions and gunfire at Nigerian university
At least eight reported dead after explosions and gunfire at university theatre hall used for church services in Kano. A bomb and gun attack on a theatre used for church…
Who do you really serve, Mr Cameron?
When your back is against the wall and you are forced to make tough choices, your real motives shine through. That is why this last week, a bad one for…
London 2012: Missiles may be placed at residential flats
The Ministry of Defence says it is evaluating sites for surface-to-air missiles for the Olympic Games, and could place them at residential flats. Residents at an estate in east London…
Gaddafi ‘funded’ 2007 Sarkozy campaign
Days before France’s presidential vote, French website publishes documents it says prove campaign funding violations. The government of the late Libyan ruler Muammar Gaddafi agreed to fund French President Nicolas…
From chocolate buttons to iPads: How quango bosses are still living the high life at your expense
The Coalition promised a ‘bonfire of the quangos’ that would save £2.6billion. But a quick glance at the organisations’ expenses claims suggests that staff aren’t feeling the heat just yet.…
I’m Arab, a Muslim, and I vote Le Pen
If French Muslims are largely left-leaning in their voting preferences, there are exceptions. France24.com spoke to three French Muslims of Arab descent, all of whom vote for the far-right National…
Dutch court bans pot for foreigners.
The country known for “coffee shops” where joints and cappuccinos share spots on the menu may see its famed tolerance for drugs go up in smoke. A Dutch judge upheld…
Women on the front line of America’s abortion war
A law threatening to close Mississippi termination clinics may have consequences for more than one state. David Usborne visits the scene of a bitter argument. The cars begin to…
Fake Viagra dealer told to hand over £14m.
A man who sold counterfeit medicines, including Viagra, has been told to hand over more than £14m by Southwark Crown Court. He kept customer’s details in a folder entitled the…
Pupils Coming Into School ‘Malnourished’ And ‘Dirty Say Teachers.
An increasingly number of pupils are turning up at school malnourished and dirty, causing teachers to buy them food from their own wages, according to new research. Almost half (48%)…
CISPA passes House in unexpected last-minute vote.
The House of Representatives has approved Cyber Intelligence Sharing and Protection Act with a vote count of 248-168. The bill is now headed for the Senate. President Barack Obama will…
The extraordinary perks of Britain’s fat cats including £25k clothes allowance, £300k for private jet fees and £100k for private school
When the shareholders of Barclays file into the Royal Festival Hall today for the bank’s annual meeting, they will be heading for a showdown with chief executive Bob Diamond that…
Goldman Sachs pays £4.1m tax on £1.9bn profit
Wall Street giant attacked for deferring 99 per cent of its tax bill. The London arm of Goldman Sachs paid only £4.1m in corporation tax to the Treasury last…
Bradley Manning judge warns military prosecutors in WikiLeaks case
Judge refuses to dismiss most serious charge but tells prosecution it must prove private knew he was aiding the enemy. The military judge in the court-martial of the US soldier…
Barclays facing executive pay protest vote at AGM
Barclays faces a revolt by shareholders angry at the pay of its top executives, when the bank holds its annual general meeting later. The chairman of Barclays is expected to…
Charles Taylor Found Guilty Of War Crimes
Former Liberian president Charles Taylor has been found “criminally responsible” for war crimes by supporting brutal Sierra Leone rebels in return for blood diamonds. Presiding Judge Richard Lussick said that…
Anti-Euro Le Pen Gain Spooks Overseas Investors in French Stocks
Pierre Mouton, a fund manager at Notz Stucki & Cie. in Geneva, looks at the rise of anti- European, anti-austerity parties across the border in France with concern. It may…
Mobile phones: “Still no evidence of harm to health”
There is still no evidence mobile phones harm human health, says a major safety review for the UK’s Health Protection Agency (HPA). Scientists looked at hundreds of studies of mobile…
Downfall of Bo Is Linked to Wiretapping of Chinese Leader
BEIJING — When Hu Jintao, China’s top leader, picked up the telephone last August to talk to a senior anticorruption official visiting Chongqing, special devices detected that he was being…
UK in recession: Where is Osborne’s Plan B?
Government’s strategy for recovery under fire as UK returns to recess. Pressure is mounting on the Coalition to reverse course on its strategy of spending cuts after the British…
Newt Gingrich ‘to quit campaign next week’
Republican presidential candidate Newt Gingrich is expected to suspend his campaign next week, US media report. The former House Speaker said he expected Mitt Romney, who won five primaries on…
UK economy in double-dip recession
The UK economy has returned to recession, after shrinking by 0.2% in the first three months of 2012. A sharp fall in construction output was behind the surprise contraction, the…
Revenge of the Murdochs: Nine months on from hacking scandal.
Culture Secretary faces calls to quit as News Corp releases devastating emails revealing his secret help for BSkyB bid Ed Miliband calls for Jeremy Hunt to resign after damning 163…
Bradley Manning judge orders damage assessment released.
A judge is to see for herself how the US assessed the damage inflicted upon the government by Bradley Manning’s WikiLeaks activities. Manning’s lawyer says the case against the soldier…
FBI warns virus victims face “internet doomsday”
Revenue from adverts tied to sites controlled by the crime ring earned them £9.1m in commission. Hundreds of thousands of computers will simultaneously lose access to the internet on 9…
Kenyans allege British involvement in rendition and torture in Uganda.
Claims by two Muslims accused of role in bomb attack during 2010 World Cup date from after coalition came to power. Two men facing terrorism charges in east Africa are…
GDP figures to reveal UK economy recession status
Figures released on Wednesday will show whether the UK economy is in recession. Gross domestic product (GDP) figures will show the value of all the goods and services produced in…
Tibetan singer arrested over “independence” song
DHARAMSHALA, April 23: Chinese authorities in eastern Tibet have arrested a well-known Tibetan singer on suspected charges of singing songs calling for Tibet’s independence. Lo Lo, 29, was arrested on…
Occupy Movement Looks Toward Political Conventions.
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Hay and grass seed cover the bare spots on the lawn in front of the stately old City Hall where Occupy Charlotte’s camp held its ground for…
‘Arrogant posh boys with no interest in lives of others’: Tory MP Nadine Dorries launches astonishing attack on David Cameron and George Osborne
David Cameron yesterday vowed to ‘stay in touch’ with voters as he brushed aside claims that he was an ‘arrogant posh boy’. The Prime Minister admitted mistakes during a turbulent…
Fear returns to the eurozone
Markets take fright at Hollande’s election lead as Dutch government steps down over budget impasse. UK Treasury seeks £16bncuts because of uncertainty. Europe’s economy took another dramatic lurch downwards…
Government revives plan for greater data-sharing between agencies
Proposals expected to include fast-track procedures to license sharing of personal data in areas where it is currently prohibited. Ministers are planning a shakeup of the law on the use…
Newham Council accused of ‘social cleansing’ of tenants
A London council has been accused of starting “social cleansing” in the capital by asking a Stoke-on-Trent housing association to take on up to 500 families on housing benefit. Newham…
Euro-style austerity at home? No thanks Germans say.
GUETERSLOH, Germany (Reuters) – Two years ago voters in this industrial city on the eastern edge of North Rhine-Westphalia (NRW) narrowly backed German Chancellor Angela Merkel’s conservatives in a regional…
Shift on Executive Power Lets Obama Bypass Rivals
WASHINGTON — One Saturday last fall, President Obama interrupted a White House strategy meeting to raise an issue not on the agenda. He declared, aides recalled, that the administration needed…
Gaddafi, the UK, and the truth we must be told
One by one, revelations from the ransacked archives of the old Gaddafi regime in Libya cast fresh doubts on Britain’s boast that it is never complicit in torture. First…
North Korea threatens ‘special actions’ against South
Military says it will wipe out Lee Myung-bak’s administration by ‘unprecedented peculiar means’ lasting three to four minutes. North Korea‘s military says it is planning to launch “special actions” meant…
Regulator criticised after woman assaulted in care home
The Care Quality Commission is being criticised for failing to take sufficient action after undercover filming showed an 80-year-old woman being slapped by a care worker. Jane Worroll secretly filmed…
YouTube loses music clips court battle.
YouTube could be forced to pay a huge royalties bill after a German court ruled that the video sharing site must do more to stop users uploading copyrighted material. The…
F1 teams to race while rage boils on Bahrain streets
(Reuters) – Formula Onedrivers will race in Bahrain on Sunday while rage boils on the streets outside, among protesters who denounce the Grand Prix as a gaudy spectacle by a…
Andrew Lansley backs lower pay for NHS staff in poorer areas
Health secretary risks new political storm by supporting proposals that unions say will worsen the north-south divide. Andrew Lansley backs lower pay for NHS staff in poorer areas Health secretary…
Lib Dem donor Michael Brown ‘extradited to UK’
Convicted fraudster and former Lib Dem donor Michael Brown is being extradited to the UK from the Dominican Republic, police in the Caribbean state say. They said he was being…
